Try to live with more clarity, that’s all. Make the other people see sense in whatever they try to impose upon you. With clarity, you will be able to identify what your own desires are, what others have imposed on you and what desires you have borrowed from others. The first set of desires alone need to be fulfilled without any harm to any person or property. The other two need to be dropped with the help of clarity. If you live this way, you will no more be fulfilling others’ desires and you will be no more living others’ lives. You will live your own life, and experience fulfillment, and you will be ready to die when the time comes. You will have no lurking confusion and fear of death. I am not asking you to be selfish. I am only asking you to bring clarity into the whole thing.
Once a Zen monk was ordered by the king to be put to death. He was supposed to be killed the next day.
The monk remained calm and silent.
One of his disciples, shocked by the monk’s calmness, asked him, “Do you realize you have only 24 hours to live? Are you not afraid?”.
The monk replied calmly, “I have lived every moment of my life, moment to moment, and therefore I have no fear of dying”.