The most talked about, thought about and written about subject is sex. The most misunderstood, misinterpreted and confusing subject is also sex! We either try to avoid the subject, or we try to indulge in it. Sex is deeply buried in our unconscious minds. Right from the start, we rarely find someone who can enlighten us on the subject of sex. Sex, more than any other subject, needs to be illumined with the light of consciousness.
Sex is a tremendous creative energy. It is a meditative energy. The whole world has arisen out of sex energy.
Our ancient enlightened masters, the rishis, have given us great clarity on this subject. Do you know that Vatsyayana, the man who wrote the Kama Sutra, the book on the science of sex – was a sannyasi ? He was celibate. In fact, he delivered the Kama sutra to his own mother.
Vatsayana was questioned once, “What authority do you have to speak on this subject?”. A natural question! I think many of you might be silently putting this question to me also! Have you ever watched two people playing a game of chess? When you simply watch the game, very often, the right move will suggest itself to you – but somehow it never occurs to the two players! What do think could be the reason? Because we are not involved in the game. So, only the man who has come out of the game, who is a mere watcher, can give you the right idea about it. A master is the one who knows the Whole. That is why he becomes the authority on any subject.
Tantra deals beautifully with the whole concept of sex. In the scriptures, Lord Shiva speaks to Devi Parvati on this subject. Those insights recorded several thousands of years ago are found to be relevant in biology today. Biology has proved that no man is 100% man, and no woman is 100% woman. A man is 51% man and 49% woman. Likewise a woman is 51% woman, and 49% man; just a difference of 1%. This is the basis behind the symbolic representation of Lord Shiva as Ardhanareeshwara, the figure that is half male and half female. Whether we accept it or not, we are an embodiment of both male and female energies. We are whole, not divided. In order to be complete, to be whole, it is essential that we are able to accept and express both the masculine and feminine aspects of our nature.
But does it really happen? Are we allowed to express both aspects?
Right from the moment of birth, society labels you as either male or female. And it expects you to start behaving accordingly. Society does not allow boys to express their feminine side, nor girls to express their masculine side. Right from a very young age, one half of our is suppressed. A male child is not encourage to play with dolls and kitchen sets. A female child is not encouraged to play with race cars and rockets. Even when it comes to colors of their clothes and other belongings, there is discrimination. You choose blue for boys and pink for girls, it is not?. Until the age of 7, the child is not conscious of being male or female. That is why a very young child has a sense of completeness. He is centered and secure. He is so beautiful and joyful to look at!
Man’s inherent nature is fulfillment. He came from fulfillment and looks to attain as well. So as a child, he begins to search for the lost half, the suppressed half, unconsciously. He starts looking at the outside world for a substitute for his own lost half. The male child starts searching for a female presence and the female child for a male presence.
This is where the whole idea of sex starts. This is how the idea of sex takes root.